Today was rainy. The girls bickered a lot–the main issue being– She has what I want. I didn’t know that I wanted it until she started using it but now I want it.
I thought of a book I recently finished (Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss) and responded: You know, it’s never great to do what everyone else is doing. Always better to be original. When you see lots of people doing the same thing, do something else. Be creative so you can be the first person to do something totally new. Over their heads? Likely. But they stopped bickering. So that was a win. And maybe it will sink in and they won’t need to read a book like Tools of Titans because they’ll already have the tools and they will be the titans. Wishful thinking? Maybe. But one can hope. (Thought provoking and worth the read by the way.)
As you may know, I am a person who cannot tolerate a discussion of children’s bathroom habits on social media. Whether they are infants or toddlers I remain loyal to the the belief that what happens in their diaper can stay in their diaper.
What I’m about to tell you may seem like it compromises my beliefs in a certain regard, but I can promise you that there will be no discussion or description of excrement.
So here we are. Big Sister is nearing her 5th birthday and Little Bean is two and a half. I know that it doesn’t matter but Big Sister was already using the potty exclusively at this age. I learned from my first rodeo that basically when they are ready to do the do they just do it and there is very little actual training.
Little Bean and I are both tired of lifting her on to the changing table for diaper changes and I am sick to death of her screaming fits that she doesn’t want the diaper changed at all. I know that she is aware of my growing lack of enthusiasm for diaper changes because tonight before bed, she just kept repeating, I’m so sick of this, I mean I’m so tired of this. I may have said something to that effect…
Today I decided to give her all the tools. She got to wear a t-shirt instead of a onesie. She got to wear pull-ups instead of a diaper and she got to have her baby potty in the living room.
What caught me off guard was Big Sister’s enthusiasm for the event. She spent the whole afternoon encouraging, coaxing, keeping company, reminding and bribing Little Bean to do her business. I had to do very little work. Even better she had some success! I’m interested to see where it goes but likely I will not keep you posted.
Last thing: Tomorrow is the three year anniversary of losing Opa (Thorsten’s dad.) Tonight before bed I asked Big Sister what she remembers of him. She said that she remembers the last day we spent together sitting on the couch and talking. She described her memories of that day and finished with, And then we had to give him back.
And maybe that is the truth. We have people for a limited time and then we have to give them back. The mystery of life is the length of time we’ll get. The challenge of life is to immerse ourselves, to be present with those we cherish. It’s not to wait to say the special things, to ask the hard questions. It’s to gather up all the stories and throw ourselves fully into love. To be bold, curious and soft. To let things sink into us, drink them up, taste their goodness and allow them to become the fabric of our souls.